Sometimes I wonder why God loves me. Maybe I see my negative traits instead of the positive ones. Maybe it’s because of the society I was born in. “Why do something if you can’t do it right?” was a statement in our household growing up, or something to that effect.
So, I lost my keys again. I wonder how many times I’ve lost my keys over the years. I don’t like it, but I don’t worry until about day three. I hesitate to ask my husband if he’s seen them, because he really doesn’t like it. I told him I misplaced the keys this morning, and he’s asked me at least five times if I’ve found them yet.
I canceled my trip to the library to really look for them. I called the pizza place he drove us to last night to see if they were there. They have a huge lanyard on them. I used to hang them up religiously, but lately they’ve been cozying up with my gloves in whatever coat I happened to wear that day. I fish them out of the coat and think, next time hang them up. But once I slide down that slippery slope of neglect, it snowballs.
I hurt my shoulder today, really bad. Exercised without warming up or it’s old age or I held it in an awkward position. I could hardly drive with our set of spare keys. I tried to keep it still and steered the car with my less used arm. I texted by voice. So, even though I know my husband is having a really busy day and he was about to leave for another appointment, I stopped at church to ask him to pray for my shoulder. He did, but it was short and to the point and he asked about my keys, again.
So, even though I knew they weren’t there, I looked throughout the church for the missing items. And I tried not to cry. I ran an errand and came right home. I looked for the tenth time and prayed and felt as though the Lord said to blog. I also took time to text my husband to thank him for praying, because the excruciating shoulder pain left. He told me God is good, he is not.
God loves us whether we’re stinkers or selfish or inconsiderate, etc., etc. I thanked God for healing my shoulder and I asked Him why He loves me when I keep struggling with some of the same things. He said, “Because I love you.”
I love my kids even when they’re not perfect, so intellectually, I get it. But to receive unconditional love blows my mind. When I find the two blogs I wrote out and one I really liked, I will plan to post it or maybe them. Why I’m losing track of things outside of the norm is beyond me, but God knows. I am getting lots done in other areas. Maybe I’ll try and be grateful for the progress I’m making and thank God for His help and for His unconditional love and relax in the fact that I’ll find the keys. I always do, even when I left them in VA on my way home to NY.
May God bless you!