In July of this year, 2022 I went to a Christian writers’ conference at Montrose, PA. Every year, I hear the suggestion, get your own website. So, I got a new blog, connieabuckley.com. I forwarded many of the previous posts to the new account. Some I will add later.
I’ve written a few blogs since July, but I haven’t posted them because I wasn’t satisfied with the writing. For close to three weeks in August, my husband and I hosted family and friends. He said, “You know you’ll have to put your writing aside this month.”
And so, I did. Cleaning house, playing board games, hide ‘n seek with the grandchildren, hiking at state parks, going to local museums I’ve never seen before, plus attending a high school reunion, the time just flew.
Then, the list of names of those at the reunion who passed away was sobering. Last night, I went to a meeting I’d missed for three weeks in a row. This morning, I woke up thinking about a guy from my hometown’s stomping grounds. I wrote a letter to this stranger about salvation through Jesus Christ because a friend asked a group of us ladies to pray for her nephew-in-law. He came down with a bad case of cancer, having to do with exposure to a contaminant, usually asbestos. It’s called mesothelioma.
He’s in comfort care, so I hope he gets the letter and my friend’s card before he passes away. I always pray for salvation and for healing. Sometimes, the answer is yes. Sometimes, it’s wait. Other times, it’s a resounding no; this is the appointed time of death.
Frankly, I pray more that God will soften the person’s heart and reach them because eternal life is so much more important than the renewed well-being of our body. The Holy Bible has so many promises and instructions for physical and spiritual life. My friend’s card has a Scripture written out: “Jesus told him, ‘I am the way, the truth, and the life. No one comes to the Father except through Me,’” (John 14:6, HCSB).
In John, chapter 14 Jesus tells the disciples that He is going ahead of them to prepare a place for them in His Father’s house, in heaven. Believers in Jesus Christ, God the Son, are told in (Galatians 5:22-26, HCSB): “But the fruit of the Spirit is love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness, faith, gentleness, self-control. Against such things there is no law. Now those who belong to Christ Jesus have crucified the flesh with its passions and desires. Since we live by the Spirit, we must also follow the Spirit. We must not become conceited, provoking one another, envying one another.”
A born-again Christian, a Messianic Jew, while living on earth is called the righteousness of Christ. Yet, many reminders abound in the Word of God that until perfected in heaven, we need to walk worthy of the calling of Jesus Christ.
So, when temptations come our way, calling on Jesus for help and remembering 1 Corinthians 10:12, 13 will keep us from falling away from our Savior. God bless you and protect you from evil.
If a person wants to strengthen their marriage, they can work on the areas that God speaks about, and authors then wrote about. In Ephesians 5, Christians are told to walk in love right at the start of the chapter. In (Ephesians 5:22-33, NKJV), the Apostle Paul, being led by the inspiration of the Spirit of God writes:
Eph 5:22 Wives, submit to your own husbands, as to the Lord.
Eph 5:23 For the husband is head of the wife, as also Christ is head of the church; and He is the Savior of the body.
Eph 5:24 Therefore, just as the church is subject to Christ, so let the wives be to their own husbands in everything.
Eph 5:25 Husbands, love your wives, just as Christ also loved the church and gave Himself for her,
Eph 5:26 that He might sanctify and cleanse her with the washing of water by the word,
Eph 5:27 that He might present her to Himself a glorious church, not having spot or wrinkle or any such thing, but that she should be holy and without blemish.
Eph 5:28 So husbands ought to love their own wives as their own bodies; he who loves his wife loves himself.
Eph 5:29 For no one ever hated his own flesh, but nourishes and cherishes it, just as the Lord does the church.
Eph 5:30 For we are members of His body, of His flesh and of His bones.
Eph 5:31 “FOR THIS REASON A MAN SHALL LEAVE HIS FATHER AND MOTHER AND BE JOINED TO HIS WIFE, AND THE TWO SHALL BECOME ONE FLESH.”
Eph 5:32 This is a great mystery, but I speak concerning Christ and the church.
Eph 5:33 Nevertheless let each one of you in particular so love his own wife as himself, and let the wife see that she respects her husband.”
focusonthefamily.com
I have a friend that got frustrated with her husband because he didn’t do the things she wanted him to do in the way she wanted him to do them. I can understand that. I remember asking a ladies’ group leader why my husband wouldn’t listen to me when I had good advice to give him. Somehow, I got the idea that I was being prideful, so I repented to the Lord. I tried not to take it personally when he went in a direction that was contrary to my leading. How many times did he give me perfectly good guidance and I went my own way? Then, a year or two later I’d tell him something I read in a book that solved a problem I was wrestling with, and he’d quietly tell me that he advised me the same way a year ago, or five months ago, etc. Lots of times. I’m so glad he’s a patient man that doesn’t hold grudges!
My friend spoke to her mentor, an older lady that she admired regarding faith and wisdom. When my friend asked how she could change her husband, she said, “Do you do the same thing you want your husband to stop doing?”
My friend got thinking. Yes, I’ve been known to do the same thing. But, I don’t want to hear about me. I want her to tell me what to do about him.
Her mentor said, “I want you to ignore the fact that he struggles in this area. I want you to work on this struggle in your own life. I want you to think about how blessed he’s going to be when you take care of your own responsibility in this same situation.”
So, she went after it with gusto. When her husband came home from work, he could sense things were different. They got talking and she told him she’d been applying herself to get rid of a habit that stressed him out. Then she invited him to see the changes she’d made. He smiled like a Cheshire cat. They had a great evening. She didn’t nag him once.
About three days later, she noticed he, too started working on the issue they shared. She called her mentor and thanked her for the valuable advice. My friend said that happened years ago. Now, if she goes out of her way to be nice to him, he says, “What did I do now?”
“Nothing,” she says with a grin.
She means it, she just felt like blessing him. They get a good laugh about it now.
To get back to our conversation, I can’t say that I’ve stopped giving my husband advice. Now, I try to ask him questions. If he says, “I know you want to tell me how to handle this situation. This is what I want to do about it,” I listen.
Oftentimes, I’ll tell him that’s a great idea, and then I’m relieved he’s thinking about it. If I disagree, I’ll ask him if I can tell him some thoughts I have about the subject. If he’s tired, I don’t even think about bringing anything up. If he’s had a really stressful day, I don’t discuss anything that might start an argument. If we’re not communicating, I’ll wait a while, for me it may be only five minutes. Then, I say, “I’m trying to understand how you’re processing this.”
Then he may say, “I don’t have an opinion right now. I’ll get back to you when I’ve had time to consider the options.”
So, then I’ll back off. The other day, something medical came up. I tried to approach in a way that wasn’t harsh. I wanted to know why he didn’t go to the doctor sooner. I have been known to ask him to get his name on a cancellation list, so he can get in earlier, but he always says “no, I don’t want to bother people.”
Plus, he doesn’t like to talk on the phone. He doesn’t want to be treated like a son by his wife. So, I don’t offer to call. I may tell him I was tempted to call, and then he just looks at me. Message received. After all these years, I know my husband. Sometimes, it may be tempting not to even talk to him, because I know what he’s going to say. I care for him too much to do that. So, I’ll force myself to open up. Once in a while, he surprises me. When two people follow Jesus, who likes change, and works on our character, I’ll see that I didn’t know what my husband’s response was going to be.
So, about this medical event. He’s finally going to see a plastic surgeon in the morning to have a small area of a skin cancer removed. It was teeny, tiny in July. I mentioned that it wasn’t good that the spot wasn’t healing, back in the summer. Then I let it go. His body is his body. Even though we are one flesh. Over the last two months it has gotten my attention. His, too. So now he’s going. We both know it’s going to be painful. When I asked him why he waited, I’m just trying to understand, he said he didn’t really understand himself, so how could he explain it to me.
Enough said, right?
He doesn’t really like me writing about him, but he gave me his permission a while ago to bring him up if I felt a need to. How can I write about marriage if I don’t mention my husband?
Now, I’m asking people in our church to come out once a month for some kind of marriage get together. A dish to pass, a small teaching, fellowship with other couples. I’m hoping it’ll bless marriages. I believe families are under attack. God made the family unit because it’s not only good for the people involved, but it’s good for society. I think we’ll have fun, too and God likes healthy fun. In Proverbs it tells us that laughter works like medicine. Yay!
One of the problems of writing blogs in my head—I feel like they’re typed and posted! Not so!
And when I first started going to Celebrate Recovery to lead groups, going through the training and the 12 steps, the word denial came up. (John 8:36, HCSB) says: “Therefore, if the Son sets you free, you really will be free.”
A way to freedom from hurts, habits and hang ups is to become aware, according to Celebrate Recovery’s advice. To come out of denial means to be open to wisdom that God gives those who ask, as stated in James 1:5.
I’ve been researching for a book I’m writing. So, I looked into Lose It For Life: The Total Solution—Spiritual, Emotional, Physical—For Permanent Weight Loss by Stephen Arterburn, M. Ed. and Dr. Linda Mintle. The tome is published by Thomas Nelson, Nashville, TN and copyrighted in 2004, 2011.
On page 71, the author(s) tell us, “In order to lose weight for life, we have to face reality or we end up lying to ourselves and to others.”
On vacation last February, my husband and I ate more, plus chose rich foods. He decided he wanted to follow the McDougall eating plan, which we did about 20 years ago.
Dr. John McDougall and his wife, Mary McDougall have dedicated decades of their lives studying the health effects of whole plant food eating to help people. We tried it back then, but the pressure to continue to eat dairy and meat and sugar from family and friends got to be hard to handle.
It can be difficult to eat at restaurants sometimes. Vegan selections without butter and oils are challenging to find in our small-town eateries. Sometimes, I get tired of a salad. So, we eat out less now. We both feel much better having made the change. Just lately, with the stresses of continued social upheaval, I find myself reading books for escapism, and eating more fatty foods/sweets for comfort. Both things aren’t great for health. Reading is not moving around much. Rich foods make me tired and bother my digestion. I needed four antacids today. And sweets trigger cravings for more sugar laden foods.
Someone left birthday cake and pizza at my house. After eating a piece of cake for three days in a row, I threw away half of a cake. The one piece seemed to be begging me to have another and then probably another. No Thank You!
The pizza upset my stomach and the cheese on it made me sneeze. Two days of indulging in the salt-laden pizza was all I wanted. I threw the last piece away because my husband only ate one slice and then he resisted. An almond milk yogurt curbed my cravings.
The Bible tells us to do all acceptable things with moderation. I agree. I feel more energetic and think clearer when I’ve limited sugar, white flour, meats, and dairy. I get protein from rice, beans, nuts, and vegetables. Are you making changes to improve your health?
Last week, I thought I’d return to Celebrate Recovery but that morning I woke up with rashes on my feet and hands. So, I stayed home.
Yesterday, I went to a doctor and he asked questions and listened for over an hour and a half. Looking at three blood draw results from the end of October, he said I’m definitely getting better, but I’m run down. So, he told me to continue resting and hydrating and eating healthy. He doesn’t know what I have, and he gave me another lab slip for more blood tests.
Last week, when the rash showed up, I told God, the great “I AM,” the Creator of the universe, that I give my health to Him. When praying, I’ve learned that in addition to having faith that God wants to answer prayer positively according to His will, that letting go of the results and trusting God-a prayer of relinquishment, can be one of the most important steps I take.
I’ve been reading in the book of Jeremiah for a while now, and God likes it when we turn to Him. He likes it when we don’t seek stuff and relationships with people and spend hours watching sports with rarely a thought for Him-when we don’t put those things before Him. He knows we need housing and clothing and food. He understands our need for close ties with people, that’s why He designed families. He realizes we need to unwind and relax. In the book of Matthew in the New King James Version it says:
Do Not Be Anxious
Mat 6:25 “Therefore I say to you, do not worry about your life, what you will eat or what you will drink; nor about your body, what you will put on. Is not life more than food and the body more than clothing?
Mat 6:26 Look at the birds of the air, for they neither sow nor reap nor gather into barns; yet your heavenly Father feeds them. Are you not of more value than they?
Mat 6:27 Which of you by worrying can add one cubit to his stature?
Mat 6:28 “So why do you worry about clothing? Consider the lilies of the field, how they grow: they neither toil nor spin;
Mat 6:29 and yet I say to you that even Solomon in all his glory was not arrayed like one of these.
Mat 6:30 Now if God so clothes the grass of the field, which today is, and tomorrow is thrown into the oven, will He not much more clothe you, O you of little faith?
Mat 6:31 “Therefore do not worry, saying, ‘What shall we eat?’ or ‘What shall we drink?’ or ‘What shall we wear?’
Mat 6:32 For after all these things the Gentiles seek. For your heavenly Father knows that you need all these things.
Mat 6:33 But seek first the kingdom of God and His righteousness, and all these things shall be added to you.
Mat 6:34 Therefore do not worry about tomorrow, for tomorrow will worry about its own things. Sufficient for the day is its own trouble.
In my own case, I don’t think God minds me going to the doctor, and this particular one happens to be a Christian, and I have been praying and seeking God while I’m laid up. Yesterday, the doctor told me to continue to rest so I can recuperate and then don’t fill up my schedule. He doesn’t want me to relapse. So, apparently, I’m still on the shelf. I asked if I ought to eat some meat and he said it’s probably a good idea because my red blood cells are low. My husband took me to eat in a restaurant in town and I ordered a Reuben sandwich on rye bread. I could only eat half because my appetite has been low and I don’t have the room to fit too much food in now. Which is not a bad thing. I wanted to lose a little weight.
I’ve been north helping with my grandchildren. They all contracted fevers days apart from each other, so time stretched out.
Two nights ago, I asked my daughter if I could borrow her computer so I could blog. It wouldn’t work.
Then, I used my old computer which she has for a back up for her job. That didn’t work either. So much for blogging while I was away.
When I got home, I went straight to a meeting. In the morning, I arose early so my sister could get to the hospital for an operation which got delayed for three hours.
I’ve been reading a book on and off for over a year now. Today worked perfectly to finish it up. Now, I’m highlighting the significant parts of this non-fiction book and working the exercises.
One suggestion the motivational writer said that I read today, “Take care of yourself.”
I’ve noticed that the older I get, when I’m busy writing or babysitting or cleaning, whatever I’m doing, I may not pay attention to changing my position, or using correct posture, drinking enough water, exercising, or grabbing a healthy meal. I appreciated the reminder.
Years ago, I read a John Maxwell book entitled, Thinking for a Change, copyrighted in 2003, which I bought. Warner Books, Inc., New York, NY published it.
I thought my husband may like it as well, because he’s studied management principles and applied them to his life for years.
I don’t know if he read it, but I remember John Maxwell saying that he worked hard to achieve goals throughout his life so he neglected taking care of himself.
At that time, he realized he needed to work on his well-being or he’d be sorry. So, he too, recommended paying attention to one’s health.
I love spending time with my grandchildren and my children, but after almost twelve full days together I told my son I hadn’t done any writing and sometimes I feel like time is slipping away. He asked me, “Don’t you think this week with the kids is the best use of your time?”
That stopped me longing for working computers. I began the first book I mentioned while the children slept. So, I did do something else besides cooking, washing dishes, babysitting and laundry. Also, we played games and read books and I got to understand the rhythms of their lives in a way I didn’t comprehend before.
Plus, extended time with my grown children is a rarity, which I thoroughly enjoyed as well.
It’s amazing how a well framed question can turn my thoughts in another direction.
My sister’s surgery went well today and she is recovering for a day here unless New York weather gets so bad that the roads get closed down tomorrow. Then she’ll be here for two days. I don’t remember such crazy weather. February had been so warm. I wonder if that’s why so many folks have been sick. Warm spells and then a few days of cold and back to balmy weather. A few years back, we had a warm winter, but it was consistent.
Well, God knows what He’s doing in regards to the climate. He knows what He’s doing in regards to my schedule. I’d been feeling like I needed to play some games and relax. I got to do that with the children.
May God bless you and watch over you and protect you.
I drove North to a city today to pick up my sister from the hospital. She is so much better than she was a week ago.
I wondered if she knew me last week. Nope. She remembered me telling her my daughter’s name and asking if she knew her.
My sister has a black eye today she didn’t have yesterday. She said they gave her quite a bit of heparin and the corner of her eye has been itching, so as she scratched it, it bruised. Same with her arm. That’s a medication that thins the blood to prevent blood clots. She told me the heparin will wear off over time. Praise God.
I was so blessed to have clear roads. The sky was jam-packed with clouds. I heard that city is going to be hit with snow tomorrow. I’m glad I picked her up today.
When we got ready to leave the hospital, I told my sister how kind the social worker and her nurse were. She thought those who work with people in a medical setting who don’t care deeply for others burn out and quit within two years.
She’s been a medical secretary for years and she’s my go to person when I don’t understand blood work numbers or a diagnosis or medicine.
I’m so glad God spared her life from the diabetic ketoacidosis which almost killed her. On a selfish note, I’m glad to be able to stay home and get ready for Christmas, Lord willing.
It is an adventure following God. My days completely change on occasion and I’ll sense God’s Spirit whispering, “I’ve got this.”
Other times, a tiny thought, “You don’t have to worry.”
Deuteronomy_5:33, (KJV): Ye shall walk in all the ways which the LORD your God hath commanded you, that ye may live, and that it may be well with you, and that ye may prolong your days in the land which ye shall possess.
I went to visit my sister in the hospital on Thursday and some of this Scripture popped into my mind for her. Something about when the Lord directs her, she should turn to the left. When the Lord directs her, she should turn to the right.
She was a bit disoriented because of a fall. High blood sugar caused her to get dizzy. She fell into the bathtub and bruised her forehead and stayed knocked out for a while. When I arrived with my daughter, those whispers of words came into my head, indicating she should listen to the Lord and follow the pathway He sets for her.
She kept nodding off, so I intend to write down what I remember for her. In the meanwhile, as she recovers I thank God that she is recovering.
I don’t understand insulin and why blood sugar can change so dramatically depending on her eating habits and the amount of stress in her life. All I know is she can’t do it alone. That’s why God gave her family and good friends and professionals to safeguard her when the diabetes gets out of whack.
We went to a church to visit another pastor and his wife and family and the congregation. We missed out on the singing but stayed for the fellowship. A meeting ran longer than we thought it would, so we were late.
This church believes as we do that the Holy Spirit still heals people. One of the young ladies welcomed us and said that she found this church after praying to God for a church where the Bible is preached from. Then the pastor told us one weekend he and his wife were away for the weekend and she prayed at the altar by herself and sometime later she realized she was pain free. She’d been suffering from fibromyalgia for twenty years. What a vibrant smile she had on her face tonight.
My sister came out of her coma before twenty-four hours passed. She’s still tired and drops off to sleep suddenly, but her bruise is significantly smaller. Her blood sugar was over 600 and now it’s over 100, so she’s on the mend. So many people said they’d pray for her! To God be the glory, great things He has done.
Hi! If you celebrated Thanksgiving, I hope you were able to enjoy family and/or friends, food, and able to give at least one blessing you’re grateful for this November.
As we sat around a large rectangular table borrowed from the church, I looked at each individual adult and child and love filled my heart and mind.
As our middle grandson said our Thanksgiving prayer, I savored his quick acceptance to the question, “Who wants to pray before the meal?”
The adults and other children quickly agreed to his response and bowed their heads. It was short and to the point and it moved this grandmother’s heart.
Psalm 37:3 Trust in the LORD, and do good; Dwell in the land, and feed on His faithfulness.
Psa 37:4 Delight yourself also in the LORD, And He shall give you the desires of your heart.
Psa 37:25 I have been young, and now am old; Yet I have not seen the righteous forsaken, Nor his descendants begging bread. (NKJV)
The author of Obeying the Voice of God, (as told to Donnie MacDonald), Jack MacDonald came to visit our church with his wife earlier this year, if I remember the time correctly. The book was published by Borrego Publishing* from the US. It was copyrighted in 2008. At the top of the cover over the title of the book, it says, “The Voice of the Holy Spirit still speaks today if one listens…”
Jack MacDonald asked my husband if he could address the congregation and received permission, so he shared some of his testimony. He’s a dynamic speaker.
My husband read 275 pages of “Jack MacDonald’s Journey” before I felt easy to ask if I could read it. He marked his page and told me to go ahead. I don’t always finish books that I own because library books have due dates and I usually have one or two of them I’m working on. I picked up Jack’s book over the weekend and the remaining chapters flew.
I’ve never been in the service, I’ve never hunted, or visited Montana or Alaska, or built a home. Yet, I’ve experienced the refreshing presence of the Holy Spirit and seen God heal people.
Donnie MacDonald showed the adventurous hunting trips, the family love and respect for each other, the peril of being in the Vietnam War and other anecdotes with clarity and with skill so I grew concerned for those in the various situations.
The book left me hungering for more of the Holy Spirit, for more time in the Word, for other spiritual disciplines and for more spiritual gifts from God.
Jack and Donnie MacDonald also influenced me to think about what gifting’s God has already bestowed on me and to ponder how well I’m putting them to use.
What would this world look like if every Christian moved in their gifting’s, obeyed God to love others more than themselves, to tithe and to plug into a body of believers with an outlook to bless people?
Add to the above the ability to hear the Holy Spirit’s still, small voice directing the Christian in specifics and we would live in a radically different world.
Once, I kept getting ideas to turn the other way or to stop at that person’s house. I argued the reasoning away. I was a new Christian, so I didn’t realize it was God. My oldest daughter got bit by a dog and afterwards I struggled with a fear of canines and the need to forgive the owners. I eventually got to the right place, but it was a battle I could have avoided.
Anyway, Obeying the Voice of God can impact your life if you’re willing to take the opportunity to explore.
May God bless you.
*www.barregopublishing.com now sells sneakers at their website and not books.
Last night, my husband and I, and my sister watched a DVD entitled, “Young Messiah” presented by Focus Features, a Comcast Company in association with Ocean Blue Entertainment, a 1492 Pictures/CJ Enterprise Production distributed by Universal with imaginings of what Jesus’ life would have been like at age seven.
When I saw the hills of Jerusalem, an urge to visit there rose up within me. So, tonight I
saw a lady that traveled to Israel with a group earlier this year.
She said it revolutionized her life to walk the “Stations of the Cross” and at one place to bear the cross until it was time to pass it on to another.
If I don’t get to Jerusalem in this life time, eventually there will be a new heaven and a new earth with a new Jerusalem as described in Revelation 21 and the beginning of Revelation 22.
The movie, “Young Messiah” showed the times, the culture, spiritual warfare up close, miracles and family unity.
Every time Jesus faced danger, I thought, it’s not His time to die yet.
God has a plan for us, according to Jeremiah 29:11, to give us hope and a future.
(I found this photo at 
Last night, my husband and I, and my sister watched a DVD entitled, “Young Messiah” presented by Focus Features, a Comcast Company in association with Ocean Blue Entertainment, a 1492 Pictures/CJ Enterprise Production distributed by Universal with imaginings of what Jesus’ life would have been like at age seven.
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